Tuturuan Kita Magluto

I dreamt of my ama this morning. I was crying my eyes out telling it to Jeff and Ate Helen. 

Now this song by the Beatles called Let It Be means more to me than ever before. Paul McCartney wrote this song when he had a dream about his dead mother. Even in death she still spoke words of wisdom to her children. 

My ama never initiated a hug when he was still alive. . It's always me who'd do it. In my dream he embraced me and I could feel his love for me. 

———

I was in my Ate Helen's house where ama and I used to live.  I was resting at their narra chair. Ama walked from Kuya Ramon's house to me with ease. In my dream there was no fence/gate between my Kuya Ramon's and Ate Helen's house yet. It looked exactly years  before ama died. He passed by Vacion who was waiting outside by the terrace. 

Ate Helen was inside the house with me. Ama motioned for me to get up. I said I'm so tired. He gently assisted me to get up and embraced me. I could feel his love for me. Then he said "halika tuturuan kita magluto". (It's weird, he was the one guiding me when he's the old one. He looked strong in my dreams) 

He picked up some utensils from Ate Helen's and took it to Kuya Ramon's house. We started cooking. I was making something I don't know exactly what it was but it looked like a wrap and vegetables inside. Like a lumpiang sariwa. Kuya Ramon was in the dirty kitchen. 

I got up and said "Hindi masarap, ayoko na" then Vacion said "ay papaupuin ka ni ama". I looked at ama and he gestured for me to sit down. I did; I continued making it. Then I woke up. It felt so real. That it took several seconds before it registered to me that my father is dead. 

It was a few minutes before 6 A.M.  I woke up my husband and told him about it because I didn't want to forget. I called my Ate Helen and shared it as well. I felt a lot better after our talk. 

I miss you ama. Thanks for visiting in my dreams. 

——

Lyrics 

Let It Be 

When I find myself in times of trouble

Mother Mary comes to me

Speaking words of wisdom, let it be

And in my hour of darkness

She is standing right in front of me

Speaking words of wisdom, let it be

Let it be, let it be

Let it be, let it be

Whisper words of wisdom, let it be

And when the broken-hearted people
Living in the world agree

There will be an answer, let it be

For though they may be parted

There is still a chance that they will see

There will be an answer, let it be

Let it be, let it be

Let it be, let it be

Yeah, there will be an answer, let it be

Let it be, let it be

Let it be, let it be

Whisper words of wisdom, let it be

Let it be, let it be

Ah, let it be, yeah, let it be

Whisper words of wisdom, let it be

And when the night is cloudy

There is still a light that shines on me

Shine on until tomorrow, let it be

I wake up to the sound of music,

Mother Mary comes to me

Speaking words of wisdom, let it be

Let it be, let it be

Let it be, yeah, let it be

Oh, there will be an answer, let it be

Let it be, let it be

Let it be, yeah, let it be

Whisper words of wisdom, let it be